Surprise, you thought I was done with the Gossip Girl reviews, well here is one more. This really will be the last one though I promise haha.
As soon as I found out this was a thing I wanted to read it. Like Gossip Girl but everyone is a serial killer? Sign me up.
This book is basically the first Gossip Girl rewritten as everyone is fighting to stay alive, as it seems everyone on the Upper East Side is dropping like a fly at the hands of our two favourite It Girls.
I really loved everything about this to be honest, I mean I think sometimes they tried too hard to fit in references to killers or blood or something gory whereas before it would reference fashion or glamour. But it was still an interesting take on the story.
I also love that this isn’t even fanfiction, this is just written by the author herself. What a queen.
My favourite thing is probably that Serena randomly took a notion to start killing people because they reminded her of Nate, and Blair, finding out Serena was a murderer decided that she too should murder people. Like it is a trend of some kind, crazy but also amazing.
So the story goes that Serena comes back into town, set on killing Nate because she realises that he is the one who has always gotten in the way of her friendship with Blair. And for them to be the bestest of friends it makes sense to kill the only thing standing between them.
Quickly though she realises that is a dumb idea, and then becomes jealous of Blair and her life once she finds out B is no longer interested in being her friend. So naturally it is time for Blair to die.
Meanwhile on the other side of things, B has decided that Serena must die because she thinks S is the one that ruined their friendship, and she was sick of seeing S be the center of attention with those adverts all over town with her.
So it is war.
Along the way, there are a lot of casualities. Although S may actually be the only one who isn’t killing just because. I mean most people in the Upper East Side were only killed by S because they knew more than they should have, for example Katy and Isobel who saw her sleeping with Nate, or that girl who saw Serena kill her brother (the girl’s not Serena’s). I mean she was only trying to protect herself…
Then there is Blair who is chaotic and will off anyone who even looks at her funny. I mean I can’t imagine seeing her just slicing a girl’s head off because she reminded her of Serena, but why not?
All the while none of them are getting caught, even by security cameras or witnesses as some of the murders happen in broad daylight, but I guess when you are rich and your family hates a scandal, it all gets swiped under the carpet.
Meanwhile there is Nate, who doesn’t kill anyone, but is pretty sure he has seen Blair do it, but he could have just been super high and tripping. So you never really know with him. Honestly he is not a big part of the book anymore when I think about it considering instead of trying to kill him, his two best girls are focused on killing each other lol.
Then there is Little J who is still in love with Serena, even if she is a serial killer, J thinks that’s a cool thing to be. Jenny also enjoys eating raw meat and there is less focus on her enormous chest this time around so yay for that?
Dan is still the same tortured poet, although this time he only writes haikus and also fantasizes about killing himself on a regular basis. What a mood. Also his poems are not as terrible as they were in original book? So that’s good haha.
Then Vanessa is making a film and is loving coming across all these dead bodies because it makes great footage for her. So that’s fun, I love that she isn’t questioning anything and just going with it.
Things come to a head at a brunch where Serena and Blair are fighting to the death basically, which I enjoy because we love a good girl smack down, especially when one of them ends up with a knife in their back. Literally.
I knew that neither B or S were going to really die because it would seem weird if it happened. Like where would we even go from there?
I also do feel that the story kind of lost its way towards the end, I know it was following the storyline of the first book for the most part but at some point you gotta know that when killing off all these people, the story was going to change. So while things ended at the Kiss Me or Die party I would have been okay if it ended differently.
Like I felt the book was destined to take a different direction towards the middle but it worked too hard to fit back into the confines of the original story at the end.
So things ended at the Kiss Me or Die party. Nate confessed he wanted to be with Blair, and only Blair. She seemed to accept this, B and S saw each other from across the room and drew their weapons but only for a second and decided against a killing spree in the middle of a party. So I guess it was a truce.
Dan and Serena find Jenny trapped in the bathroom with Chuck as they did before. Only this time, Chuck does not get away so easily, as Jenny, Dan and Serena take their turns inflicting pain on Chuck until he dies. And then they ride off into the night.
And that is where we leave our Upper East Siders, for good this time. I mean I’ll probably continue to binge the TV show from time to time but as for book reviews and blog posts this is it.
It has been a wild ride but I have enjoyed it a lot, and I’m glad I kept this one until last because it was something fun to end it.
So until next time,
You know you love me,
~ Courtney x